[3] Start changing small actions and
create new habits to conquer oneself.
Mind it! a diary of vagrant
journeys within the mind.
Our immediate
environment around us has been chosen or created by ourselves. Sometimes we do
this selection mindlessly, and on most other times, we choose our
action-initiators or inhibitors deliberately. Let us examine a simple example.
We choose to watch TV at night. This is done mindlessly because others are
doing so, and that seems like the only time to watch TV during the day as you
are busy through the day. But, we also choose to watch some specific TV
programmes, and we choose specifically the late hour until when we would watch
TV. This is done specifically.
These choices stop
us from doing our work in time, or if activated with proper deliberation, our
initiators can help us in completing our tasks well in time. My elderly
professor used to speak proudly of his students and his team to others and
would acclaim that his students or his team members would never make it to a
meeting or complete an activity in time. He would pause and then exclaim that
his students and his team would always be at a meeting or complete their
activity well before time.
I heard another
professor explain to adult trainees that being able to complete tasks in time
leads to a stress-free life. And, on the converse, not being able to complete
actions in time creates stress, ill-health and also gets passed on to members
of the family or colleagues and friends. I used to wonder if he was merely
bluffing and trying to frighten the adult trainees to be serious about
completing their tasks. It was not so. Immediately after he spoke, one after
the other, each trainee stood up and recounted their personal experiences and
agreed with the professor’s perceptions.
Most of the time,
and with some friends that I know, all the time, we perceive ourselves as
perfect individuals. We assume that we can do no wrong. We perceive ourselves
as being a very objective individual, always able to judge what is correct and
what is wrong, choose the right actions and deny ourselves wrongful actions. We
feel that we have self-determination and that we can decide our plan of action
for the day and go about and achieve it. Our short-term and long-term plans and
actions are always completed to the best of our satisfaction, we claim to our
friends and colleagues and family. We assume that all our actions are
independent of compromise or judgement of others. We are wrong in all these
assumptions. We are usually not able to achieve objective action, and we are
never independent of the opinions and suggestions of others.
Let us examine a
very popular and most familiar example that repeats itself every day around us.
How many people we know who are chain-smokers or boozards? They know that they
are wrong in their actions and habits. They attempt to break their habits and
go for counselling and are also sometimes forcibly committed by their family or
friends. They stop smoking and boozing, and after a while, they are back to
their habits. What is the actual problem? We keep looking at others, at our
environment, at our family and our friends and colleagues and compromise on our
habits by judging others or learning from others.
The secret is that
the source initiator for all our wrongful actions or non-actions or laziness or
procrastination, the source is within our minds. We are responsible for not
wanting to do something in the right time, in the correct manner and with the
proper actions. We bring up some internal deep-down-in-the-mind thoughts that
make it absolutely rightful and reasonable to avoid taking up actions that are
necessary. We create a logical framework to postpone our actions.
How does it happen?
When you reach your home after a strenuous 12 hour day, you find that the most
comfortable place is the couch that is placed directly in front of the TV. I
did a small experiment at my house. I removed the couch and other chairs placed
in front of the TV and replaced them with a workout machine and exercising
equipment and a yoga mat. I presumed that it would be the perfect change
inducing innovation. It was not to be. My mind rebelled against doing exercise
while watching TV, and similarly I could not sit on the couch and do nothing.
After a day, the seating arrangement came back to the earlier positions, with
the couch in front of the TV.
One should not
choose drastic changes. Our mind rebels against us and creates a very strong
inhibitor. Establish small and gradual changes. Remember, it takes about
twenty-one days for our mind to accept a new habit, and it is usually about
forty days for us to assimilate the new action as a normal behaviour. Place a potted
plant next to the couch, and remove the side table where you would keep snacks,
drinks or ice-cream. Is there a centre table in front of the couch? Remove it
and place some bean bags and allow children and others to relax on them.
Therefore, you have removed all options to eat snacks and also dinner while
sitting in front of the TV.
This deliberate
choice of making small changes should be extended to the office space also. Do
you choose to drink a milky-extra sugar tea or coffee at the same time every
day in the office? Make small changes. Walk to the canteen where they make the
tea or coffee. Go alone. Talk to the attendant or canteen manager and change
the manner in which you would have tea or coffee. Replace the sugar with
sugar-free, or replace the milk with milk powder before choosing black or green
tea with a slice of lemon without sugar or milk. Why? It is better to choose
these life-saving habits much before you are forced to do so due to poor
health.
Create small and
effective changes in behaviour and habits. Ensure that you know your habits and
addictions. Do you start the day with the morning newspaper? Junk that
behaviour. It is the most threatening moment of the day when you are hijacking
nearly sixty minutes of crucial get-up-and-go time in the morning. Read the
newspaper later during the day, page by page at different times. Check the
amount of time you need at the breakfast table and the cutlery that you use.
Choose a smaller plate, and a smaller portion, perhaps taking more portions. It
will force you to change your breakfast menu from an oil-driven omelette to a
more healthy choice. Make these small changes for change is the only constant
in your life, as the cliché goes. Mind it!
Published earlier at - http://intellectualpost.com/mind-it-a-diary-of-vagrant-journeys-within-the-mind-3/
Published earlier at - http://intellectualpost.com/mind-it-a-diary-of-vagrant-journeys-within-the-mind-3/